Monday, September 13, 2004
I duwan I duwan I duwan I duwan!!
I very sad. Dun ask me why. I've been very sad since a few days back. I crying now. I haven been too good nowadays. I just dun like and not used to not talking to him.. He's haunting me.. His face, his mind, his soul, his voice and everything are coming to me every single minute. I really would do anything to make him come back. Really. I can give up my basketball. I would work hard for everything. I would be the happiest woman on earth. When I see my friends, I used to feel proud as I've got him mine. Now that I see them, I feel that I'm nothing. It's stupid. I know. I'm sorry. Then his nick put 'Attached!! Bwahaha..!' I see liao of cuz will think it's attached to a girl or what mah. I sad leh then I asked my 2 friends. They say it's dunoe what NCC thing or maybe the company thing.. I dunoe la. I wanted to ask him but it's like very busybody lor? ... Just finished crying in toilet.. Zzz. I feel like staying inside more but Mummy want to use liao. Haiz.. I've been drinking lots of water, to refill my tears. Why am I doing all these? Crying over a guy just lidat? This afternoon, me and the other friend of mine, said to wait for them coming back. I think hers will come back de lor. Mine, I dun have much confidence. She sure that her guy wun change heart. Mine, I really dun dare to bet. He's good looking and is the best guy I've ever met. Really. I'm lucky to be his gf but I duwan to be only part of his life. I want to pei him walk through the whole life.. I want to be his girl and everything.. I want to. Friends comforted me and said that we'll be together eventually. But is that just a consolation? I duwan a consolation. I duwan anything. I duwan people to console me. I duwan to break. I really duwan to. I told him that I duwan, he said it's childish. But I really duwan. I knew it'll make me suffer more. I knew I would cry more. I knew I would be empty and all. He said that I dun cherish. I want to. I only want to care and love him, besides my family. He is the one I want to marry.. I know it's far and silly but really. I Love Him. I really do.. Will we be together?